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What if Piper Blush had been featured in Playboy?


If I had been a star in the ’70s, I could have gotten a phone call from the bunny Mansion! Now, that’s all assumptions, but since I got one from the immoral “Brazzers” to be in front of the camera for them after the viral Sports Bra Vs No Bra Jump Rope Test video that got over 18,000,000 views on YouTube. I think it’s fair to assume! Why I don’t like Brazzers, that’s another story…

And if hypothetically, I had been Miss August, I would have had to fill in the Centerfold Data Sheet. Here it is!

Name: Piper Blush
Bra Size: 91.5 cm or 32 DDD
Waist: 25 cm
Hips: 98.5 cm
Height: 5’6″
Weight: 124 lbs
Ambitions: To spread love worldwide by making videos and photos that make people smile. 
Turns-On: Honesty, Funny, Intellect.  
Turnoffs: Vulgarity, Negativity, Dishonesty. 
Phrase to Live By: It’s the ride that counts, not getting to the end. 
I Stand Up for: People to find what they love in life and make it their livelihood. 
My Strongest Influences: TheRock and I Dream of Jeannie.
My Ideal Couple: Iris and Carl Apfel, because of how she takes care of him in the documentary, Iris. 

Let’s play! Ask one of your friends to answer one of the below questions. For example: What size bra do you think Piper Blush wears? After he reveals his answer, you tell him the right one from this Data Sheet you now own. If he argues, Super Easy, forward him this email for proof ; )  

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